Sickening: How a 17-year-old 'sex offender' (he had sex with a 15 year-old) was 'cured' of his 'deviancy'

I came across this when I was gathering information for this post. This is an excerpt from a book that's more than twenty years old now, but things like this still go on. We'll be writing more about it. The book is called "Overexposed: Treating Sexual Perversions in America" by Sylvere Lotringer.  This excerpt is a personal account by a teenager who was convicted of a sex offense. At age 17 he was arrested for having sex with a 15 year old.  This is something out of "Clockwork Orange," only scarier.

They gave me a five-year probation and I had to promise that I would go back and forth from Dayton to this clinic in Chicago...They make it look like it’s voluntary, but half the people go to the clinic only because they sign a piece of paper. Have you been to the clinic? There’s this guard at the door. You’re not allowed to go in by yourself. You’ve got to wait downstairs so you don’t get to the other floors and rape the personnel-that’s why. You go every two weeks, and every time then probation officer knows you’ve been there. If you don’t go, you’re in trouble. They’d put you back in jail.

At the clinic they give you all these tests to fill out about what was wrong with you and how you feel about your problems. Of course I had to go along with it, all the quizzes and things to screen you, like, “I’m feeling a little girl’s underpants,” and how it arouses you, from 1 to 10. It didn’t arouse me, but I did it anyway. How are you going to be truthful if they’re going to lock you back up?

…After that they give you this test where they connect this thing called a “penile transducer” and they let you watch this slide show. If you get an erection, it’ll come out on the computer. They let you see these slides of adults, children, and a whole bunch of other things…it’s frustrating because it gets you horny and it stays in your mind. They’ll have you do stuff like counting backwards from a hundred in threes to get whatever it is off your mind. It can take ten minutes sometimes. So it’s very aggravating to sit there in the dark doing this counting over and over again dealing with getting erections…

A year later they put me on Depo-Provera. According to the tests, I needed it. This drug would stop you from getting an erection to anything…They said, “you can stop whenever you want.” So I stopped, and they threatened to stop seeing me because I hadn’t asked ahead of time. And if they had stopped seeing me, then the court would have said, “well, we gave him a chance and now he can go back to jail.” So in order for me to pass the test, I would have to not be aroused at all. Then they gave me the test to make sure I was taking it. So I had to cheat the test…The only thing they work with is your penis…Now if you close your eyes or pinch yourself when you peak, to stop an erection from coming, they wouldn’t know. They figure I’m on the drug and that’s why I don’t have an erection…

The doctor wouldn’t let me quit. I was taking 100 milligrams a day for about two weeks. I had less sex drive, but I was getting sick. So I just stopped. I went over to the clinic and told the doctor what I did, and he had a heart attack. He told me that I was the doctor, then, so I shouldn’t even come and see him because I didn’t listen to him. He said that if I did it one more time, he’d take me off the course…And you know what taking me off would mean once the judge found out. So I stopped taking the drug, but I kept filling out these forms asking, “how many times did you get an erection today?” I just wrote, “low.” I’d lie along to make it look like I was taking the drug…

After the social-skill group, they start you out with what is called “masturbatory satiation” sessions. They give you an hour-long cassette and you’re supposed to masturbate out loud for an hour, in your own home, in private. The doctor talks it over with you first. I did it. I took the tape home. It gets boring, like they say…

So I did it, but I felt exactly the same. I didn’t see any change at all. A lot of people came in and said it changed their ways, but they were all liars. They even told me on the side just to stop doing them.

I started with the masturbation, but after a few sessions I just talked into the tape recorder for an hour. Because it didn’t do me any good…I still got off on the same stuff. I knew inside my head what turned me on. Everybody was telling me to cheat. Talk into the tape recorder and don’t masturbate. So that’s what I did…Everyone does it.

After ten weeks, they give you the test again. That’s when people cheated. It’s like a fight with the computer. Every little movement and it goes on and off. Some people close their eyes or stick a tack in their shoes and press on it to pinch their toes and stop the erection from coming...You see, once I’m through going there, I’ll be another “success” for them…

Most people say they’ve been treated just to get out of here, but others will be honest. They get put in a group with this other doctor. That’s when the drug comes into the picture…He’ll talk you into the drug, into increasing the dosage more and more, like he did to me. The way he put it, you couldn’t say no. There’s no research data to support whether the drug does damage or not…

Then the drug started. The side effects were cold spells, sweating. They gave me two more drugs to stop those. I felt worse than before, so I threw them all out. I could never reach him. I just kept getting the message machine. Anyway I started pretending I was taking the drug. They would try to catch me off guard by making me take the test. I’d cheat and fake it and pass it.

There are a lot of people who aren’t open at the clinic. The ones who aren’t open are the worst, because they get depressed. They think there’s something wrong with them. So they would go through the whole thing, thinking they could get help from it...I had the same thing happen to me. You feel so bad, you start thinking of suicide…I tried to kill myself in jail. The pants I used to hang myself ripped.