An excerpt from a post on Cathy Young's blog:
Some years ago while researching an article on the date-rape controversy, I interviewed several people on various college campuses who had some connection to the handling of sexual assault policies and complaints — mostly university officials and counselors. As a litmus test of sorts, I showed them an article someone had sent to me from a campus newspaper in which the author recounted an experience of “rape” by a girlfriend, consisting of non-forcible but persistent advances to which the author finally gave in. (The girlfriend began to make sexual overtures after the author told her, while in bed together, that perhaps they should end the relationship.) Rather to my dismay, almost every person I interviewed agreed that this story was in fact a rape. (By contrast, every single person to whom I showed it outside academia thought it was ridiculous, and several thought it was a parody.) The exception was one Women’s Center counselor who looked quite annoyed at first when she was reading the article, and made a comment about how the author was obviously trying to make a point. Then, as she read on, her expression changed and she said, “Oh … it’s a woman.” The author was indeed a woman; the counselor had mistakenly thought it was a man, and assumed that this man was trying to make the point that, by some current definitions of rape, women routinely rape men too.
FRS COMMENT: First, to consider this incident "rape," based on these facts alone, is absurd regardless of the gender. Second, if it's not rape when women do it, it's not rape when men do it. Persons who assume it must be rape when males are the "aggressors" but not the other way around only serve to underscore how politicized the entire issue has become.
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FRS COMMENT: "First, to consider this incident "rape," based on these facts alone, is absurd regardless of the gender. Second, if it's not rape when women do it, it's not rape when men do it. Persons who assume it must be rape when males are the "aggressors" but not the other way around only serve to underscore how politicized the entire issue has become."
Well, that pretty much nails it!
The only "rape" or sexual assault most people (in general) seem to care about is that done by men/boys against women/girls.
I'd suggest that gwallan's comment to Connie Chastain from May 16, 2010 9:45:00 PM would fit perfectly right here.
That link, which appears to not have been embedded properly, is: http://falserapesociety.blogspot.com/2010/05/rape-culture-101-origins.html?showComment=1274060740688#c3691889808237590954
Hell, it was so good, I'm just going to quote the whole thing:
gwallan said...
@Connie...
Boys are victims of half of child sexual abuse. Women commit about a quarter of child sex offences and are probably about a third of the offenders.
Nobody knows how many adult male victims there are nor how many adult rapes are committed by women.
Even young boys who are raped by women are treated with mirth. They are considered to have gotten "lucky". To have been "privileged" by the experience.
Oprah Winfrey has, on several occasions, presented to her audiences women whose only claim to fame is having had sex with a little boy. Those audiences reward those rapists with standing ovations. These are mass rallies supporting rapists which are packaged up and beamed to hundreds of millions of women for their "entertainment".
In my country, Australia, our leading womens' magazine New Idea paid travel and living costs for a US woman thus enabling her to consumate her internet grooming of a fourteen year old boy. It was treated as a cutesy romance under titles such as "Schoolboy Lover". The women of my country sponsor sex tourists!
There is a rape culture alright. A culture in which victims are mocked and denigrated. A culture in which rapists are lauded, applauded and rewarded financially. A culture in which victims are held responsible for their own experience of rape - and that of others - because of a mere coincidence of gender.
May 16, 2010 9:45:00 PM
Gwallan has alluded to that magazine's conduct in the past, and I am glad that he gave us specifics here because I'd like to do a piece about it.
By the way, I find the debate on that blog with Alas! a complete waste of time.
I am reminded of an angry comment that now-U.S.Supreme Court Justice Sam Alito made to my opponent in a hotly contested oral argument on a summary judgment motion I once filed: "Mr. [so-and-so]," Alito said, "how can you assert that a reasonable jury would find in your client's favor based on these facts?"
My opponent looked at the judge like a deer caught in the headlights, and blurted out, "Well, maybe not a reasonable jury . . . ."
I received the court's decision in my favor two days later.
I would be slumming if I did what Ms. Young bothered to do there.
"Slumming" is the right word. That sort of constipated "arguing" back and forth with people who are going to say what they're going to say no matter what is definitely a "waste of time."
Ms. Young and the others who write on these issues nationally aren't nearly as aggressive as you are, and they tolerate a lot of bullshit in order to sound "reasonable." The reason I like this blog is because you cut through the fog and call it like it is. You don't tolerate woman-bashing, but you don't waste much time arguing feminist zealot who are on a political mission.
I like Ms. Young, but this blog is where it's at in terms of protecting the interests of falsely accused men.
"It is also worth pointing out that when ostensibly gender-neutral domestic violence laws began to result in a steep rise in arrests of women, the reaction from most women’s advocates made it very clear that these laws were meant to target only men. And not just advocates: the mainstream media, too, carried articles about domestic violence laws “backfiring” or having “unintended consequences.”"
That is true, and was discussed here yesterday.
"but you don't waste much time arguing feminist zealot who are on a political mission."
Frankly, I think this blog could do less of that.
Thanks, Anon at 8:50. I hardly ever even read feminist blogs, and did not read the discussion on Young's blog with the feminist blog.
Unfortunately, we do need to acknowledge that the public discourse in this area is established by the sexual grievance industry, and that their advocacy has shaped the way the falsely accused are mistreated in countless ways. It is for that reason alone that we need to address and act as a counterweight to their more grievous canards and false tenets. But I agree, arguing with feminist bloggers who advocate about rape is generally a waste of time. And too easy.
I used to debate on Cathy Young's blog, but I stopped doing so some time ago. And she only blogs sporadically now anyway.
She is something of an apologist. Her position seems to essentially be that feminism is largely a positive and necessary movement that has simply gone a bit too far in some respects and become a bit too accommodating to extremists. All we have to do is smooth off the rough edges and all will be fine. To me, this approach doesn't really do justice to what has really been a destructive and totalitarian movement.
And she is not a big fan of MRAs and father's rights supporters either. While some criticism of the radical and extreme fringe of the MRM is more than justifiable and necessary, she has a tendency to lump the majority in with the most wacky and extreme.
In her book Ceasefire she claims that the men's rights movement is basically just a male equivalent of feminism, i.e. just as bad. Somehow she never quite squares the logical problem of criticizing one movement for being as bad as another movement she claims was absolutely necessary.
In any case, her comparison is quite unfair. The proof of the pudding is that Cathy Young has effectively been excommunicated for refusing to go along with certain feminist falsehoods. How many of us have been excommunicated from the MRM for simply refusing to go along with false advocacy propaganda? Surely that is proof of which movement is more honest, accommodating and beneficial.
She is no doubt a lot more reasonable and decent than most feminists. But she is no ally. She is at best a fairweather friend.
"Frankly, I think this blog could do less of that."
When we bother doing that, it's to highlight a point for those readers who have stumbled across our site and aren't steeped in the debate. The only group I care about trying to persuade is what I call "middle America," or "middle UK" or Australia or Zealand or Canada -- people who stumble across us and say, "Wow! I never knew there was this problem." And "Wow! How hateful are those people who don't care about the fasely accused!"
My guess as to why most of the academics agreed it was a rape is that they probably recognized it as a trap, designed to show up any possible double standards in applying absurdly broad definitions of rape when the genders are reversed.
Of course, any sensible person should realize that when you are forced into defending absurd positions merely for the sake of intellectual consistency, it obviously suggests there is something wrong with your worldview.
Thanks, Nick. I need to rely on people like you to put some of these issues in a larger perspective.
I don't follow Young closely, but she writes well on false rape issues: "But feminism shouldn't be about . . . blindly supporting women. It should be about fairness, including fairness to men who find themselves under the cloud of a charge that can never be proved or disproved." But I can't speak to any of the other things you mention.
apublicdefender.com
Tonya Craft, a former kindergarten teacher, charged with 22 counts of various sexual offenses involving 3 minor girls, was acquitted today. You may or may not have heard of her. I wrote a post recently about the trial and some of the outrageous antics engaged in by the prosecutors.
She was represented by Demosthenes Lorandos, who apparently has made a habit of successfully defending child sex cases across the country, and who hilariously said at the post-verdict press conference: “I do not lose”.
The media has been all over this trial, bringing it much needed attention. At first, the attention focused on the misbehavior of the prosecutors [see this for some very questionable comments during closing] and later the complete lack of qualification and training of the so-called “child sex experts”.
Twitter was set ablaze today as the jury was deliberating and the tweets of joy were abundant when the verdict was announced. Parties have been planned, interviews being given on the news and Ms. Craft will now fight to regain custody of her children.
All’s well that ends well. But this is not a happy post, nor is it a merely celebratory one. While Ms. Craft has the opportunity to return to her life, there are lessons for all of us. A fellow defense lawyer asked on Twitter: “Who is #tonyacraft and why [is she] any different from all of our other human tragedies?”
She is not. There are hundreds of Tonya Crafts out there in the criminal justice system, every single day, pleading to charges to avoid lengthy sentences or attempting to fight the false allegations and losing.
Any criminal defense lawyer (like yours truly) saw a stream of familiarity in the continuing coverage by news reporters of the direct and cross-examinations of the witnesses. The dissection of the forensic interviews by the defense experts was a veritable checklist of the problems associated with such after-the-fact divining: repeated questions, leading questions, suggestive questions. Pressuring children to answer a certain way; the worst form of confirmation bias. The prosecutors attempting to cast the defendant in general terms as a bad person, a person of loose moral character, thus equating foibles in their character with child molestation.
This. Happens. Every. Day.
Child sex assault allegations are the scariest of them all. The power to believe a child is overwhelming and the fear of disbelieving a child is even greater.
Will the media be there tomorrow when yet another Tonya Craft is hung out to dry by our criminal justice system and our courts that are so quick to label anyone merely accused of such a crime as a heinous monster? Will the public rise up in support every time there is a trial with questionable evidence and even shadier tactics employed by prosecutors and experts?
Or did Tonya Craft get attention because she’s white and she’s a woman?
There’s a well documented disparity between male and female sex offenders and the treatment they receive in our courts. Women are more likely to receive probation and less jail time than men. Women are more likely to have websites created which count down the “hottest” sex offenders.
Men are vilified and universally regarded as creepy and generally guilty.
cont....
Imagine if it weren’t Tonya Craft on trial, but Tony Craft. Would there be the same hubbub? Would anyone even bat an eyelid? Would the media’s treatment of the trial have been the same or diametrically opposed?
I don’t mean to demean the victory here, but this is a great opportunity for those who aren’t “in the know” in the system to realize several things:
1. People are falsely accused of crimes
2. Child Sex cases are the most difficult to defend against
3. Prosecutors routinely rely on questionable “experts” to get convictions
4. Just because a man is accused of molesting a child, doesn’t mean he’s guilty.
The next time you get asked to serve on a jury, think long and hard about these things and about Tonya Craft and about the witchhunts that go on every single day in all our courtrooms across the country.
Congratulations Tonya Craft. You board a plane and given an interview to NBC, it is your right. There will be some noise made about grieving the judge and the prosecutors, but if history is any guide, nothing will come of it. The town in Northwestern GA will return to normal and soon this will be talked about as a fairy-tale. But tomorrow, another Tony(a) Craft will be arrested and charged and will go on trial. Will he/she get justice? Will you be there to cover it? Will you know the difference? Will you turn a skeptical eye? Or will you join the mad rush of hysteria that has swept the nation in condemning the despicable child molester?
Your eyes have been opened. Whether to keep them open is up to you.
Thanks Pierce. My two cents is always free. Providing some perspective on these things is the least I can do. And as per my own advocacy propaganda, only 2% of claims made in my posts are false.
The quote you posted from Young is a classic 'No True Scotsman' type argument, and as such is a dead giveaway about where she is coming from. i.e. she offers up some idealized version of what feminism should be, rather than how it is actually practiced by the vast majority of self-identified feminists.
"Rather to my dismay, almost every person I interviewed agreed that this story was in fact a rape. (By contrast, every single person to whom I showed it outside academia thought it was ridiculous, and several thought it was a parody.)"
Can anyone find a better illustration of the declining standards of academia than this? I guess common sense is a bourgeois social construct that must be eliminated.
My favorite saying is: 'an intellectual is a person who has been educated beyond their intellectual capacity'.
If my girlfriend responded the same way, I can guarantee that every night when I go to bed I would be telling her that I want to end the relationship.
What kind of a moron is this guy, making a false rape claim in a newspaper over this? Any girl who is sweet and caring enough to want to stay with you, and is willing to offer great sex in order to change your mind, is an absolute keeper.
Question (and please don't flame, this is a legitimate question):
Do you see feminism as a planned conspiracy or a collection of people with strong beliefs?
I know it reads like an odd question, but I get the impression that many see it as an actual premeditated conspiracy that was created by some group of women a few decades ago that is orchestrating some kind of takeover. I mean this versus a group who felt disenfranchised, has strong ideals and formed a movement based on those ideals, like any movement throughout history.
I am not a conspiracy person, but some of the comments I read here and elsewhere imply that many are.
Thoughts?
Anon at 12:22: I am founder of this blog and will answer you this way: Don't the feminists think Patriarchy is a conspiracy? Turns out they were correct: Patriarchy is three guys who meet at the urinals
"Do you see feminism as a planned conspiracy or a collection of people with strong beliefs?"
A lot of this depends on how we define 'conspiracy'.
Also, I call false dichotomy.
Anyone who planned a conspiracy that large - accounting for the whole movement - would surely have strong beliefs.
My personal view is that feminism as a whole was not some planned conspiracy.
BUT that is not to say that there are not plans which are made, by people at the top of the movement, who have the attention of governments, businesses, media, etc.
That is, powerful people do indeed secretly make plans, and put them into action, and by any other name these would be 'conspiracies', although that particular term is too LOADED. 'Plans' will suffice.
And yes, both they and the people surrounding them, those who orbit this locus of plan-makers, all have very strong beliefs.
The orbiters, be they radical or not-so-radical, need not have any particular connection to the formation of plans themselves, but they willingly assist in the name of HELPING WOMEN, in whatever way the plan-making locus feminists dictate.
E.g.
Some powerful feminists central to the movement undoubtedly believe that women are beautiful and wonderful and worth more than those pieces of shit in human form, men. There is NO POINT denying this - it's been written out explicitly time and time again. There's no denying that powerful feminists think this way.
They might thus oppose attention being given to victims of false rape claims, since this would deny the right of women to get men locked up and raped for the flimsiest of reasons (or none at all).
Their followers, not privy to these intentions, only hear that 'false accusations only happen 2% of the time'.
They are good followers, and they promote this message, and zealously silence other viewpoints, believing themselves to simply be helping women in the harsh patriarchal world they've been TOLD they live in.
(By contrast, every single person to whom I showed it outside academia thought it was ridiculous, and several thought it was a parody.)
I say, This is an example of the current phenomena of Gender/Raunch culture "constructionists" who dominate many universities. These Quackademic deviants gain an entrordinary degree of "Empowerment" by manufacturing and diseminateing faulty and inflamatroy missinformation.
The real perversion is when these Gender/Raunch constructionists pervert our law enforcement into "Manufacturing statistics" for them.
Why has society deemed it accepteable for the Gender/Raunch community to "Empower" themselves by standing on the backs of the matriarchal underclass males.
I believe its time to dis-empower the Gender/Raunch constructionist Elite, for they have lost their moral authority to lead this country.
Chef,
Thank you for your response. Your description is on target with my take as well, which of course makes it right.
I understand that there are some who push an agenda far beyond the boundaries it was meant for and that some of those are in leadership positions. There are also many willing sheep to follow along, accepting the dictates they are handed.
I just get concerned anytime someone speaks of an overarching agenda with malicious intent, as that can be easily turned around and slapped on the FRA, or any other, movement (as it so often is).
I tend to believe that even those holding radical beliefs, assuming they are not emotionally wounded, have a genuine interest in improving things. That being said, there's a lot of emotional wounds in the world.
And Archivist, hilarious!
Im emotionally wounded, and i want those responsible for my suffering to feel the pain that i believe they are responsible for. Its quite simple really!!
May 18, 2010 1:14:00 PM
May 18, 2010 1:17:00 PM
May 18, 2010 1:20:00 PM
Enough already.
Yeah, I'm sick of the babbling about "gender/raunch" this and that, repeated ad nauseum. It subtracts from this blog.
I've thought of doing it on occasion, just because it would be funny to suddenly see it coming from a regular poster.
But yeah, I don't understand the ad nauseum near-identical postings.
I did trudge through the very tedious discussion at Cathy's blog and the following comment struck me as very revealing as to the thought process of those feminists who advance the "rape culture/patriarchy" meme:
"The problem is that, absent bruises, torn clothing or other physical evidence every date rape allegation turns into a “he said, she said” and it is very understandable why a woman would not report it. So long as we have “innocent until proven guilty” we have a rape law that serves the interests of men rather than women."
Yup, centuries of legal precedent (from Magna Carta and habeas corpus forward) that attempts to limit the tyrannical power of kings and governments thrown out the window. Just. Like. That.
This viewpoint is authoritarian by definition and is yet one more avenue for tyranny to encroach upon liberty and freedom. It also represents at best ignorance of and at worst a wholesale attack on notions of free society and governments of laws and not rulers.
And +1 to those tired of the "Gender/Raunch" poster who may as well be a spam bot.
"The Gender/Raunch community of perverts tries to empower click here to get viagra!! their moral constructionist elite diet pills for less $$$ save here matriarchial underclass society."
Seriously, that's how I read these now.
That would be "hilarious" if one day eveyone starting "manufacturring" commenrts/wrote that way. I say, But this inflamatroy would be a preversion of our "comments" policy/community.
"The problem is that, absent bruises, torn clothing or other physical evidence every date rape allegation turns into a “he said, she said” and it is very understandable why a woman would not report it. So long as we have “innocent until proven guilty” we have a rape law that serves the interests of men rather than women."
*****
That makes no sense as applied to the United States, since men are convicted all the time based on nothing more than he said/she said. Now, if we really did have a system based on innocent until proven guilty, the conviction rate for rape in this country would more closely resemble the UK's.
If you stopped bothering to even pretend that the defendent has rights, then of course there would be even more convictions (as if there aren't enough already!). But the portion of innocent people going to prison -- including women and even sometimes children -- would go through the roof.
Not that "Cathy" gives a damn about that.
"The Gender/Raunch community of perverts tries to empower click here to get viagra!! their moral constructionist elite diet pills for less $$$ save here matriarchial underclass society."
Seriously, that's how I read these now.
****
LOL! Click here to learn how you can stop the unconstitutional gender/raunch feminist matriarchal and add three inches to your cock!
My posts may be a little repetitive, but i believe i target the root of the perversion, while others chase at windmills with toothbrushes.
This isn't out of arrogance that i say this, its simply what i observe, and yes, maybe their are a few Gender/Raunch community sympathisers here that are offended when i point out that the Gender/Raunch community Are the loudest (anti hetero-sexual male "Agitators") on college campuses around the country. To deny this reality is an act of "willfull Ignorance".
But i will also temper my posts to be reasonable to fellow posters and readers.
Thank you for letting me vent some anger I have at those who have constructed the paradigm of perversion that has ceaselessly attacked me.
Again, i will temper my posts in the future.
Anon @ 7:03:
Absolutely! Habeas is hanging by a thread as it is after being eroded under Bush and the trend has continued full-steam ahead with Obama and AG Eric Holder. Heck, Obama has now even claimed the power to assassinate any American anywhere in the world on decree alone.
And those of us not fortunate enough to be among the upper tiers of society, whether in wealth, power or both, certainly exist in a "guilty until proven innocent" world. Especially when facing sex crime charges. Any effort to further us along this path, by the criminal Administration of the moment (R's and D's) or feminists or anybody must be stopped. It's a very slippery slope!
~~~~~
And to the "Gender/Raunch" poster, please don't feel that you need to 'temper' your posts -- especially among this crowd. It's just that they often recombine the same 15 or so words/phrases ad nauseum (hence the spam bot comparison!). I'd like to hear what you have to say, just expanded beyond single sentence posts that all use nearly identical wording. Cheers!
Break the feminist law enforcement alliance!
Wow! Gender/raunch speaks!
Thanks for the aknowledgement, it's good to know there's a thinking person behind those words.
I personally believe the elitist MALES are responsible for feminism, and have posted the article about Feminism's sugar daddies in the past.
Women have not been the 'underdogs' through out the entire course of history, until one day in America...
I fully believe feminism is an intentional and well planned effort by elitist MALES that succeeded beyond anyone's wildest dreams. I believe the same 'ism'(as in raceism) was attempted with minorities as well, but it was white women that took the ball and ran with it.
Women have never been powerful enough, smart enough, organized enough to have pulled it off on their own volition - and I say that as a woman smart enough to look behind the obvious.
Women WERE smart enough to take the advantage thrown them and run with it, the results being broken homes, disenfranchised children, corruption of laws and the disembowelment of the Constitution.
It's men against women, women against men, while the powers that be enjoy their success.
Don't believe it? Read on...
Monday, May 17, 2010
How the SCOTUS Federal Sex Offender Ruling Ensures Health Care Reform
SCOTUS ruled this week that the feds can continue to imprison federally held "sex criminals" once their sentence is served.
In doing so, the Court deep-sixed interstate commerce legal challenges to the healthcare mandate.
That would include Florida's legal challenge, filed by Attorney General and Republican Governor wannabe, Bill McCollum, upon passage of healthcare reform..
As reported by the L.A. Times, High court's sex offender ruling endorses federal authority, 5/17/10):
The Supreme Court set a potential blueprint Monday for upholding the recently enacted healthcare law and its mandate that all Americans have insurance, saying Congress has a "broad authority" to pass laws that are "rationally related" to its constitutional aims.
The Constitution not only gives Congress the power to regulate interstate commerce, the justices said, but the authority to enact all laws that are "necessary and proper" to carrying out this authority.
(...)
Although the Constitution does not say that Congress can establish crimes or prisons, Breyer said, Congress can regulate interstate commerce — and most federal crimes, such as drug trafficking, have a clear interstate link. So if Congress can send criminals to prison, it can also require that they be held indefinitely if they are deemed dangerous, he said.
Quoting 19th century Chief Justice John Marshall, Breyer said Congress may use "all means which are appropriate" to carry out its constitutional powers.
(...)
Only Justices Clarence Thomas and Antonin Scalia set out the small-government theory of congressional power voiced by those challenging the constitutionality of the health insurance mandate. Thomas said Congress had only the "powers enumerated in the Constitution," and holding prisoners beyond their terms goes beyond a specific enumerated power.
McCollum's lawsuit deals with "...whether Congress can regulate inactivity — in this case by levying a tax penalty on those who do not obtain health insurance. "
And the Court's ruling pretty much indicates that yeah, Congress certainly can.
What goes around usually comes around. And usually, out of left field.
(smashedfrog blog - a woman who's husband is on a sex offender registry for internet viewing crimes).
Others have already picked up on this comment from Cathy' site:
"The problem is that, absent bruises, torn clothing or other physical evidence every date rape allegation turns into a “he said, she said” and it is very understandable why a woman would not report it. So long as we have “innocent until proven guilty” we have a rape law that serves the interests of men rather than women."
My own take is that the inaccuracy of this statement is that it presupposes that all men have a way to gain via the presumption of innocence, when, in fact, there are but two groups of men who can gain, and, combined, they are but a small segment of society - those that rape, and those that are falsely accused of doing so.
Yes, the presumption of innocence can aid the truly guilty - but this is hardly unique to the crime of rape. And, we cannot allow a situation in which the innocent are are denied that right simply in the hope that the cost of their "expense" might serve to bring justice to the guilty (as if current laws don't already serve that end quite well).
the simple fact is (and I've seen it first-hand) a greater threat to the successful prosecution of real rapists now comes from the growing awareness of the prevalence of false rape allegations.
Perhaps, as a way to illustrate to the person who made the offending comment, we could also state that so long as women are always believed to be honest in their claims, we have a rape law that serves the interests of (dishonest)women rather than men.
My own take is that the inaccuracy of this statement is that it presupposes that all men have a way to gain via the presumption of innocence, when, in fact, there are but two groups of men who can gain, and, combined, they are but a small segment of society - those that rape, and those that are falsely accused of doing so.
****
I disagree. All people gain from a (real) presumption of innocence for those accused of crimes. I don't think you can transgress this principle without degrading the rights and dignity of all.
If the state can falsely accuse some people -- with the blessing of the law -- that means that everybody has an obnoxious nanny looking over their shoulder, who is unaccountable to anyone.
Of course as guys we are always wrong, doesnt matter if we are just fallowing their lead, we are wrong.
I personal have been accused of this, police took me into question even tho i asked for the officers number so my lawyer could talk with them he would not allow this. It became very apparent that no matter what i had to say the Cop did not want to hear but im a rapist. When i attempted to show him all the text messages She had sent me the next day. I was told that they were not for me and they were for my roommate. At this point i walked out on his interview as he had no idea what he was talking about, as he did not know what was in the text only that she said they were not for me and that was enough for him not to want to collect evidence. Thank God I saved them on my phone.
6 months later Im pulled arrested for a DNA warrent in the lobby of my building. Durning this test i was assulted by the police, called a long list of names, and told that they dont give a shit about my rights. Kind of funny when the police say they dont care about rights. The whole time not saying a word as per my lawyers direction
about 2-3 months later Im arrested and charged, ii walk in with my father and about an hour later Im let go on a promise to appear. I have got a lawyer with one of the largest law firms in Canada.
After about 2 months of waiting i was able to sit down with my lawyer, she told me most of her store didnt match they other peoples that had given statements. She got my roommate who is my bestfriend and his Gf who was also my roommate to give statements aginst me. At this point i handed over a number of text from the girl that she sent me the next day, Including one where she asked me not to tell her BF that we had sex. Who would send there rapist messages asking them not to tell their BF????. Guess she didnt want to be found out that she was cheating.
This is still not over almost a year after she made the claim. Im almost 100% sure that this will get thrown out once the crown gets a hold of these txt, but the hardest part about this all has been dealing with my roommates/friends.
We have all moved, and live at different places now, i do still see them, but as per my lawyers advice i cant talk to them about the case or anything like that and that has been the hardest thing.
The other night i caved a bit, told one of them that not being able to talk to them was killing me i didnt care about the money or anything just not being able to prove to them, and that she could fill their heads with what ever story she wants and has been for almost a year, I cant even show them the text that prove Im not this person she is claiming and showing why she is doing this to me.
I dont know how or why i was so lucky to be blessed with such great friends but her response while i was sitting on her sofa balling my eyes out about not being able to talk to them and prove Im not this person, was that if she thought i was a rapist i wouldn't be sleeping on her sofa that night.
Its great to know that they are supporting me durning all this but i still know that in the back of their mind they keep asking them selfs what if. And I cant do anything to take question out of their minds with out the crown saying Im trying to influence the witnesses but she can tell them what ever she wants. And these are the people that have been their for me from day one, the ones that when i got got charged offered to let me spend a few days with them if i needed to, the people i love and care about.
If you ever did not believe false rape report hurt people i hope this shows you the other side so if you get caught cheating, or do not want your parents to find out your active, or anything, claiming rape is not the way it destroy's peoples lives, friendships, families.
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